If you ask me, are you happy, then I always say: “happiness comes and goes”. This is absolutely not from myself but I heard it com from a wise person. It is not a constant feeling, not for me but what is happiness actually?
And sometimes it is indeed something from the smaller things. For me is happiness feeling grateful. An intense feeling from the heart. The aaaahhhh feeling caused by a piece of music or fireworks.
Years ago I was often out for dinner. By preference to a Vietnamese restaurant were I always ordered one plate with half portions from another plate. I was always happy that they said yes to that because I usually had a craving for two dishes but it was to much to eat by myself. The women who served there started to know me and were always interested to start a talk. With one woman it was about her family and about her land were she came from. With the other woman, it was completely different, much about the purpose of existence and how I dealt with situations in my life. It was very nice to talk with her and I also saw how she enjoyed it.
But like so many things, these things were also changing, nothing stays the same. The woman with whom I always was talking left the restaurant and decided to start a shop with clothes. My relationship with the man I always went to the restaurant stopped and I saw her just a couple of times in her shop but then it stopped. I moved to another part of the country and didn’t com so often in to that town.
Not so long ago I was back into this town. I was waking around and went in the direction of the bus. I was passing her little store. Would she be there still? I look at the windows with all the clothes and after I passed the windows, I saw her behind the counter of her store. I put my arm up and waved and smiled at her. I know for sure that she didn’t recognize me, but the fact that someone laughed and waved at here, lighted her up. It was like a light was turned on. That night I kept on seeing her face.
The next day I told it to a friend who is always asking are you happy? Again it made such an impression on me that I cried of joy when I told him: “Do you know”, I said to him, through my tears “this is the true happiness were it is all about”. A spiritual teacher said regular to me : “Irene, I see you!
Now I see what he meant. I SEE YOU!
Irene Brakman.
morningstarrs 